Epilogue – The Daughter’s Review

my Papa

I know what a tough time you’re going through right now, and I wish I could be there to give you love and cheer and distract you by asking you political questions that get you all riled up. I can’t give you hugs right now, but I can tell you something that is profoundly important that you hear and understand.

When I was little, I drew you cartoons to tell you that you were the best Papa in the world. Back then, I didn’t have an objective measure of how good you were compared to the total population of fathers in the world, I just loved you. Now, I love you more than ever, AND I have some sense of how incredibly rare it is for people to grow up with fathers who shower them with unconditional love, attention, care and support. From all of my experiences with the world ( from my friends, books, movies, newspapers, school, everything) I have yet to hear of any father who measures up to you, who has so thoroughly devoted themselves to being their children’s friend, mentor, caretaker, comforter, and guide (maybe Don Corleone was an ok dad, but he put way too much pressure on his kids). But I am very serious about this. The more I get to know the world, the more I learn about child-parent relationships and how complicated and painful they can be, the more amazed I am at how blessed I’ve been. Alec and Nico and I aren’t perfect, and we don’t always make the right choices or know exactly what to do with ourselves. But in the end, we will live our lives right, because you’ve raised us to be good people…we know how to love and trust others, we know how to do good in the world, we know how to treat the people we love. We love our family unconditionally, even when we rage about this and that. And believe it or not, although the three of us are such different people, all of your children have inherited the best parts of themselves from you: Alec’s fidelity and craftsmanship, Nico’s charm and sweetness, my empathy for underdogs and fierce distrust of the powerful. We have these qualities partly because they were inside us, but mostly because you showed us how to have them, and you encouraged us to develop them. I don’t want to sound all Gospel-brimstone, but the christians got one thing right…no matter what, people reap what they sow. You have worked your whole life to sow nothing but love. And your family loves you so much that it’s impossible to express, because it’s impossible to express how much you’ve given us. You’ve given us everything, and you deserve everything in return.

I love you so much. I do love Ruth Bader Ginsburg, but you’re my actual hero.

love, Rachel