Lotte could not be challenged, on anything. If you, or it, didn’t conform with her view, either it did not exist, or it was a personal insult. She could ignore anything not on the approved list. (eg. Myra’s announcement of pregnancy…Lotte contonued to speak right over it). It was awesome to behold, and scary…she could fly off any minute now.
Ans she could never be criticized, for anything. Lanchester refers to the “emotional violece” that is inherent in such a character. She would never accept a simple no, or a refusal. It landed back on you like the vilest betrayal.
She was never properly trained. Instead, she was groomed for narcissism.
The more you tried to escape her, the more devious became her methods for roping you back in. Over years of escalation of this pattern, the firmer and more insistent were the lies.
Sadly, the more we humored her, the stronger became her entitlement. The escalation required her to eventual bypassing of discussion altogether: she just did what she wanted with out asking. She simply presented you with a “fait accompli.” If she expected you to object, or resist, her wishes, she would proceed without your knowledge or consent.
There was no discussion, certainly no arguing. There was no winning, or agreement. Unless you rolled over. If you rolled over too many times, the only way out was total capitulation. Or you ran away. If you ran away, you couldn’t have an address, or a phone. Or even a job. She would find and pursue you. Why doesn’t he want to talk to his own mother? Cad.
She was a force of nature. The force of her will. No one could overcome it. No one could challenge her. Fear. She could explode. Or not, depending on who was around.
And yet, there was another side. She could be fun and entertaining
