To My Alumni Magazine

We were not the only ones to think of Scaramouche and the Commedia dell’Arte when learning of Anthony Scaramucci’s appointment to the White House staff.  The association prompted the King of Jesters to contemplate at long last the sorry state of the republic for which we weep.  You will note that ever since this tragicomedy…

In Process… Every year, people hit themselves or others with sticks, often unintentionally.  In the last few years, however, there have been uncountable violent incidents with sticks involving dozens of innocent people, perpetrated by young lone-wolf males of indeterminate origins, but usually white (duh…). Here are some good rules for proper stick management. DON’T handle…

–Two bits says he ends up at Goldman, Sachs. –Naah, he wouldn’t dare. –So, bet me.

Shoes!  My shoes!  I gotta get my shoes on.  The blood was good, real good.  But the fist in the air was the telltale sign.  Whoa!  Who puts a raised fist in the air other than a Black Panther, or Tommie Smith and John Carlos at the 1968 Olympics?  And Donald Trump ain’t no Black…

Postmaster Bethel Post Office Bethel USA Dear Sir or Madam, We have just received a notice from the Bethel Tax Collector informing us that we are delinquent in our quarterly tax payment of $ 4,655.88. We now must pay $153.57 in interest and penalties. Oddly, this mysterious “disappearance” of our tax payment has occurred several…

Right in the middle of this whole NSA snooping scandal, our government has issued an urgent terrorist threat based on what it calls “unusual chatter.” What an amazing coincidence; surely it must be some sort of a prank. It has become axiomatic that we no longer believe anything that our government tells us, especially when…